August: The Summer Surge and tips for Support💜
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“That’s not my business—all couples have their issues.”

One of the most common misconceptions about domestic violence is that it only affects two individuals in a romantic relationship—when the truth is that it impacts entire family systems, and seeps out into the larger community.


This has been evident in many of the recent DV cases in our Minnesota community, one being the tragic shooting that happened two weeks ago at a Cub Foods in St. Paul. This incident began with a domestic assault call, and ended with severe injury to two bystanders. Situations like this are far too common; in the last decade, several studies have been conducted to identify the link between mass shootings and domestic violence. These studies found that between 41-68% of individuals who committed a mass shooting, also had a history of domestic violence.

What you can do to help

We all have a role in ending domestic violence—this is not a private family matter—it’s a public safety issue. One of the best ways we can grow a safe community is by supporting the victim-survivors we know personally. This could look like:

  1. Letting them know that you are a safe person, and that they can come to you for help or support:

    Letting a friend/neighbor/loved one know that you’re noticing their partner’s (or family member’s) abusive behavior can be validating. Survivors often doubt their experiences, particularly when their abusive partner uses tactics of psychological manipulation. This can be extremely isolating—letting this person know that you’re there for them could be lifechanging.


  2. Asking them what you can do specifically to support them:

    Supporting a survivor of domestic violence is not a one-size-fits-all approach; every survivor has a unique experience, and what you might see as helpful could actually be harmful. Having open dialogue with this person about what kind of support they need is the best way to approach this.


  3. Coming up with a code system:

    Establishing a code system with the survivor in your life can be a really helpful way to establish and maintain safety. One example of this could be sending numbers via text or email (if these are safe forms of communication). #1 could mean: something is starting, but they are okay. #2 could mean that things are starting to escalate, and they are feeling worried. #3 could mean that they need someone to call the police, and they’re going to try to leave the house, and #4 could mean that they have already left, and are at a safe location you established together.  


  4. Help them access supportive services:

    There are supportive services available to you or your loved one experiencing domestic violence, such as the therapy, advocacy, and case management services we offer here at DAP. If you would like to access these services yourself, or ask an advocate questions about someone in your life you’re concerned for, you can call us at 612-874-7063 x 232 from Mon-Fri, 9am-5pm.


    With looming federal funding cuts to victim-services, organizations like DAP are at risk. If you’d like to keep these vital services available, please consider donating today:

DAP in the news

Last week, DAP Executive Director Amirthini Keefe, and DAP Domestic Violence CCR & Intervention Facilitator Melissa Scaia were interviewed by KSTP Eyewitness news. Here’s some behind-the-scenes photos for you!

Save the Date: Carnaval of Courage!

Interested in supporting our work? Click the link below.

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July 2025 Newsletter